Entrepreneurship, Fashion, Girl-in-Transition, Lifestyle, Motivation

Diary of an Exasperated Entrepreneur

August 29, 2018 – 7:00 am
It’s Time
(After several months of holding back) Aha! I think my mind is finally made up. My family supports me, I mean, there is not even a hint of hesitation from them. Even my daddy Ade says he is at peace with my decision. Most importantly I have prayed about it. I am really sure of this!
So sure mehn!

September 6, 2018 – 6:30 am
Last Days

I’m humming to Jason Derulo’s beautiful “Goodbye” tune as I take the elevator to the infamous office not-so-frequently travelled. What a fantastic feeling! Could there be a more giddy feeling in the whole world?

I walk into HR’s office and before I can say a word, I’m told by one of the representatives to grab a chair.
I smell trouble, so I hold-off on why I’m actually here to see HR.
I’m told my shoe is non-compliant, and in a 20 minute long and heartfelt lecture, I’m warned never to wear it again or my next appraisal will be affected. Ke sì ma wòó o, the shoe isn’t non-compliant lai dat lai dat o; poor shoe…my heart goes out to it, but now I’m in a new fix.
How do I handover my resignation letter to the same representative that just gave me this TEDx talk? Being the omolúàbí that I am, I know it won’t be proper to do this; so I smile, say thank you, turn and hand over the letter to another representative.
Oh, so you even came here to resign?” She remarks. “Yes ma” I respond, still smiling. Nothing actually beats this priceless moment 😅. I’m reveling in it and it fits me like a two-piece Louis Vuitton skirt suit.
I’ve never been more sure of anything. What a perfect life!

October 6, 2018 – 5pm
Mixed Feelings
The sun is shining so brightly outside this huge building. I’m getting a lot of “Lydia, we will miss you greatly”. Such mixed-feelings! I’m leaving certainty for uncertainty. I’m leaving a couple of great people I’ve known and come to love over the years. I feel some sort of loss. But I still feel really good! I log out for the very last time.

First things first, I’m going to sleep for a whole month! 🤣😅. Why don’t I feel nervous about this new life I’m about to get into? Could it just be the initial euphoria?

November 14, 2018 – 9am
Work Hard
Work! Hard work!! Reaaaalyyyy hard work!!!

Guys, work has almost scraped my hair off mehn. I seem to have been working harder since I left my ‘9 to 5’ (even though, truth be told, it was never ever a ‘9 to 5’; more like a 7:30 to 6:30 for me).
But now it’s a lot like ‘8 to 9’ I can’t afford to faff around, but I’m glad because I am in total control of my time.

Did I mention? I started volunteering at this government secondary school and there is an inexplicable fulfilment that wells-up when these fellas say “Thank you for coming, Miss Tolu”.
I’m working harder now, despite the reduction in naira stacks compared to my previous job.

Anyhu this is sha still the life! I’m certain. *Licks coldstone*

December 22, 2018 – 6pm
Joyful Glee
I’m screaming with so much overwhelming glee! This is by far the best Christmas I’ve ever had! For the first time in my life I’m sharing love with over 100 under-served children all at once! So much time, planning, teamwork and hardwork has gone into this! Christmas is not just fun for me, it is value for some children who my team and I, with the help of a lot of amazing people have been opportuned to gift brand-new clothes and food to today.
I feel a rush of excitement mixed with contentment and the privilege to impact my community altogether.

Ahhhh Lord, I think I’m beginning to see the purpose and the light at the end of this long-ass tunnel. Never been more gingered in my entire life!

January 9, 2019 – 4am
UnCertainty
Now that I’ve given up the good for the great, ehm, what next?
I feel mentally stressed.
I feel physically drained.
I think my skin is beginning to go two ways. Where exactly do I even belong? Please can someone define what “certainty” means again? Cause I think I’m not really understanding. Mehn, this life is so hard. So so hard. I’m so unsure of myself.

February 12, 2019 – 2pm
Sold Out
Faaammmm! I think I’ve finally gotten a hang of this. Can’t believe I even doubted myself! Toluleye you ehn! Chai! Folabomi closed so many sales this month, we even sold on Twitter for the very first time! We practically sold-out this soldier-girl pieces! This is making so much sense! Major sales coming up. I see the light! I was totally made for this! This is what assurance looks like!

March 3, 2019 – 4pm
A Hot Mess
I’m currently crying hot tears. I’m so frustrated! Such great loss! I did not bargain for this. I put so much effort into everything, why does it not seem to count?
My brother is giving me a heartfelt motivational talk of how such disappointments are bound to come with business. My sister-in-law is giving me a tight hug and just letting me mess-up her fine dress with my tears.
My friend who has also taken past hits in his business is on the phone with me telling me why I can’t give up.
I’m wiping my tears. I’m trying to suck it all up. They say I need to be strong, it’s part of the entrepreneurial initiation.

E pain me oo. I can’t even lie. Why do I feel like I wasn’t made for this? I feel like a hot mess.
O su mi mehn.

April 17, 2019 – 9am
A Beautiful Life
They were all right! They were absolutely right. I got a beautiful surprise that points to how God is beginning to make my hardwork payoff small small. Maybe it will all be worth it afterall. Yes, I still have a couple of falling and rising moments, but that’s what makes the soup sweet at the end. I’m learning a lot about emotional and business intelligence.
I would pick this life over any other.

Now I’m wondering why I got so hard on myself earlier.
I’m grateful for it all; the good, the bad, the ugly and the best that is yet to come.

For this life, I STAN!

Heyo, welcome to my life. 😊

Muse: Toluleye

Soldier-Girl Pieces 👗: Folabomi

Photography ?: Tixels

57 thoughts on “Diary of an Exasperated Entrepreneur

  1. Tolu Tolu Tolu
    How many times did I call you?

    You’re a rare gem, i remember the day you told me you were resigning i sincerely got that good bad uncertain feeling for you.
    But what i was most certain about was that God was with you and you have a special grace upon you, could even smell it anytime you came to buy fabrics.

    Well I like the fact you told us it wasn’t easy o because someone will just read now and goan resign with no confirmation and planning. Enjoy God’s grace in your life dear and tixel ehn can snap for the whole world 😀

    1. Hahahaaaa 🤣🤣 thank you Buchiiiiiii ♡♡♡♡ if I’m rare then you’re scarce mehn ! 😀🤣 lol.

  2. Intriguing read Tolu, this was a great read. Well done and good luck on your journey. You are blessed! 😘❤️

    1. Rhulani! Thank you so much! People like you inspire me to keep pushing. Thank youuu darlinggg ❤❤❤

  3. I’m always here for beautiful writings and pictures. I think you should write a book. A picture book…lol

    1. Hahahaaa! A PICTURE BOOK! FOR REALLLL! I know I’m shouting but THIS IS SUCH A GREEEEEAAAAATTTTTTT IDEA! Ha but will it sell ? 🤔😍🤤❤❤ Kai. Thank youuuuu dear .. IHS an ignited lightbulb moment… lool

  4. You ain’t seen anything yet baby girl! In the midst of the uncertainties and worries, lie great achievements. I’ll definitely see you at the top someday very soon. Just keep at what you do.
    Trust me, I wish you the very best!

    1. You are My Inspiration big Sister! You are so dogged, hardworking and smartworking! Please just know that I look up to youuuuuu. Thank youuuuu for constantly pushing me. Thank you for everything ♡♡

  5. This is so inspiring Tolu and it hits so close to home because I am an entrepreneur too and juggling a 9-5 and a business is one of the hardest things to do. So now just FLY and do you.

    Congratulations on Everything!
    Go girl!

    1. Ah babessss I can totally totally relate ! God will see you through and He will make it blissful! Thank you baby.

  6. This is everything. You practically have no idea. I have no words. That resignation part felt like a great turning point moment or those kind of scenes in some type of movies that always have happy endings. Enjoy the ride every step of the way.

  7. 🚨🚨🚨 Wow. So detailed. Feels like I was there all along. I’m glad you’re doing very well for yourself. You really inspire me Tolu. More of God’s grace upon your life.

    1. Femiiii! Skolzz to the world! 🙌🙌🙌🙌 Thank youuu hun. You know we are at this together. Love you big.

  8. Wow! This is inspiring.

    You know the best is yet to come, yeah?
    Keep being you shugar ❣and don’t forget you’ve got my WCE💜.

    Greater you.

    BTW, that dress is something else 👌 and I don’t even wanna talk about your glowing skin yet!😉🤗

    1. Hahahahhaa thank you my darling Comfort! My skin is not glowing kankan ooo 😂🤣🤣 .. hehe thank you boo

  9. I’m here….. I made it here! Lol… Okay… So, It was a good read for me following you through the different phases… I used to wonder how you managed a 9-5 and your sewing gig(which I’m currently going through…you left me in this😪)…. You’re a strong girl dear. I’m glad you’ve taken this decision cos it shows you know what you want! You’re gonna do great and with a supportive family, nothing can beat that. Here’s to more wins🎉
    My fav girl is the ‘hot mess’ In our weaknesses we’re made strong! 💜

    1. You will be Perfectly perfectly Fine! I assure you! Thank you love.
      Hahahaa. Yesssssss! Hot Mess is my favourite girl tooooo !

  10. Where will I even start from.

    Lemme goan take a deep breath fes. 🚶🚶,

    Aunty Tolu!! I have moved 360 degrees on my office chair right now, thinking of where to even start commenting from.

    Thank God say the chair no get mouth, e for don shout at me.

    See Ehn, you are just so legit. Let’s say motivational speakers should come and learn from you.
    But wait o, you now handed over the resignation letter to another person 😟😟, I’ll give it straight to that HR that just scolded me, and even put folabomi’s complimentary card inside. That sir/ma, you can get the best design for your wife, or for yourself.

    Then I’ll walk majestically out of there, because God is definitely in control. But because we still need more customers and referrals, it’s good you gave another person the letter 😂😂😂.

    You are inspiration growing on its own. Just like these plants that grows on its own, you are directly watered by God, and there is no other choice, than for you to continue to flourish in his grace.

    It’s really not easy been an entrepreneur, I have a little bit of the experience too, but trust me, so long you are determined, the sky is the beginning.

    Lemme comman be going before I finish my tea break here. 😂😂😂🏃🏃🏃🏃.

    Plus I almost forgot to tell you that you write excellently, effortlessly, and emotionally.

    Let me tell you that I love you now,😍😂, before the original owner shows up legally. 😂😂🏃🏃🏃🏃💕💕💕💕💕🙌🙌🙌.

    1. 🤣 Lmao 🤣🤣🤣 thank you, Ife. Had a good laugh with this. Love you too 😘😘😘❤. Holding on to your wise words dearly. Oshey gannn. You are an inspiration too hun ♡♡♡ Loving how far you’ve come.

  11. Real life , real stories.. this is a really great one giving smaller entrepreneurs like me insights and hopes for our rise and falls.. I can really connect on the times when I’m not able to make sales and cry .. you are blessed to have beautiful people around you.

    More grease to your elbow sis, continue to motivate and inspire us (as I always say)… ❤️

    1. I’m so glad this piece comes in useful for you dear. Thank you so much for believing so much in me ❤❤. We keep rising 👊👊👊💪💪💪

  12. Toluuuuu

    This is very inspiring, read it twice already and this is an indication that there’s still hope for me…. Had to leave my 9-5 also ( well mine was 8-5 🙄)and trust me, I still sit down to ask myself if I made the right decision.. I’ve cried more and have definitely worked harder….but one thing I know is that better days are coming.

    P.S- I admire your strength 😁

    May God continue to bless you and your business.😘😘

    1. Amennnnn! Thank youuuuu darlinggggggg! So glad this post is meaningful and useful. I’ve seen what you do, I have tasted it and you definitely have something priceless! You’ll be thankful for all the decisions you made eventually. You rock girl! ❤❤❤ keep pushing

  13. Nice…! Trust me you are way ahead, hence the reason you are a mentor any day. You are a trailblazer…. Well done girl.

  14. Toluwaleye!!!!!
    Girl, you’re such an inspiration and your way of life is everything!!!

    I bless God for you, I bless God for bringing light to your uncertainty, I bless God for how far he’s brought you!!..
    You’ve inspired me with this write-up of yours and I learnt a whole lot from it .
    One of which is with determination,God, and family, you can get what you want if you set your heart to it..
    Ride on girlllll, you got people like us looking up to you 🤗🤗🤗

    1. Bunmi 😢😨😍😍.. I don’t even know what to say. Thank you love . I’m glad the post spoke to you. Can’t wait to see all the amazing things God has in store for us 🤗😍😍❤❤💃🏽

  15. Day 1 !
    You are Real!
    You are Legit!
    You are what Apo people call “Gospel Truth”

    Heaven’s spotlight is literally on you!
    Like shinning! Full light! Everything.

    I’m in Awe of your process and much more than I am now is what I will be of your Future Becoming!

    Take all the beautiful Curveballs life throws and make a video game out of them!
    Cos I know you can!

    1. And now this picture you’ve painted cant leave my head! 🤣 Making a video game out of all the curveballs.

      Ah Christiana Ojo, I love youuuuuu! Thank you for walking into my life and for being a selfless cheerleader. May God keep FLOURISHING your existence.

  16. This is so awesome! I really do admire you. I love your courage and determination. You are a big inspiration to many of us. Thanks for sharing. I’m not planning to become and entrepreneur but I gained a lot from this. GOD bless you sis!

  17. I believe in step after step; piece after piece. All these after a while become great achievement. Nothing just erupt from nowhere apart from volcanic eruption in geology. You have taken the initial courage Tolu. That step scared a lot of people thereby rendering their dreams to monthly stipends. I hope it all become easier, fun and more money henceforth.

    I believe you can make it. You are cut for motivation & greatness. Let nothing weigh you down. My mama will be glad if she know you. Wink. I like those smiling faces too. They lift soul.

  18. Personally, I’m in love with not only the narration, but how the pictures really brought it to life! Then the outfitttt??!
    But you’ve got this Tolu. And God’s got you. You be bad guy now.

  19. Lovely read..you were definitely made for this!
    Remember that whenever you’re in doubt.

    I pray God continues to bless the works of your hands 🙏🏻 and may your smile always light up the world around you

  20. Warm hugs big sis. I can relate. I moved from jobs to jobs. At a point was doing two jobs at the same time. But deep down, I just knew it wasn’t my place.

    Entrepreneurship is not beans oo but it sure teaches a lot.

    I use you as an example to a lot of people. You learnt really fast and you’re very hardworking.

    Well done sis. You inspire. You shall stand before kings and not mean men, that’s what He said.

    Do not fret.

    Let’s journey together

    1. Amen! Amen! Thank you so much for the vote of confidence. Let’s journey together 💃🏽💃🏽💃🏽

  21. Wow Tolu. You are an amazing lady, I don’t think I tell you this enough, I’m sorry. I haven’t met you before but you always inspire me, you took a huge leap of faith wow. I also plan on focusing into fashion designing fully and leave my 9-5 but I don’t have the confidence and faith you have so I’m still stalling till God knows when. You are a huge inspiration, continue to do good. Like I’m so proud I know you, come and be my mentor na

  22. I’m impressed, I’m inspired. In fact, I’m short of words. I remember booking an appointment with you about the time you wanted to take this decision that I was also nursing and I’m glad it turned out to be a bright side for you.
    I’m walching you in 7D…Go gurl, the sky is your starting point.

  23. That’s a long read.

    Good to see you are taking that route and finally quiting 8 to 5. Good luck to you and your brand.

    Cheers !.

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